They change the channel like we’re on remote control.
And we never even notice.
Who remembers how much everyone hated dumbass C-student George W. ‘The Decider’ Bush and Dick Cheney?
Cokin’ and chokin’ on his pretzel and talking about how God told him to be President.
Turns out 'God' was his mom.
Right after 911, everyone was saber rattling and watching BBC live footage as the U.S. war machine plowed across the desert in Afghanistan, hunting for weapons of mass destruction, served on an emotional backdrop of symphonic music.
And Tony Blair swooning,
"Oh, Mr. Bush, you're so rough and tumble. We shall drive those heathens back to their holes!"
I remember cruising past LongHorn Steakhouse, where every gas-guzzling Suburban in the parking lot had a little black square with a white 'W' stuck on the back window.
Sleek, unobtrusive, and tasteful. Designerly, classy, a status statement.
And at Ryan’s Steakhouse…Red, White, and Blue full bumper stickers were plastered across the back of every Jimmy. ‘Power of Pride’, complete with a Gold Eagle.
Saddam was hung, but no weapons were found.
The Left absolutely hated Bush and, through guilt by association, Christianity.
And everyone mocked Cheney’s Haliburton stock.
I remember thinking both of those elections had to be stolen. You know, because it's always so reliably close. Some things never change.
By the end of W’s second term, every Republican admitted they fucked up.
Oh, well. Christians aren't perfect, just forgiven.
That’s how Obama became President; the anti-Bush palette cleanser, carrying 60% of White voters, and 99% of Black voters.
Young, black, hip, celebrated for being articulate, and squeaky-clean.
Carefully crafted and teleprompted. The community organizer.
Barack Hussein Obama. Wow, just rub it in our faces.
The Facebook President. Remember, Zuckerberg Caesar?
The administration didn't make you do everything. Maybe it was because you were young. Maybe.
But the war never ended.
Finally, after eight years of having political correctness shoved up our asses and down our throats, America desperately needed an enema, it was Trump to the rescue.
The Reality TV President.
And now, after years of BLM burning our cities and Black businesses to the ground, a surprise Biden election, a second recession that looks a lot like 2008, only a lot worse, the expansion of BRICS, the open border, wars on multiple fronts, unaffordable housing, mass layoffs, AI accelerating like...like you'd think it was an arms race...and a third shooter...
...Bush, Cheney, and Obama form a circle jerk and endorse Kamala Harris. Some young people say it’s better than the alternative.
Because compared to Trump, Bush was just doing his job.
So, all the hatred of Bush has been forgiven and forgotten like it never happened.
Obama endorsed war in the Middle East, too.
Pass the torch. They're all buds in the Uni-Party.
Republican or Democrat, it doesn't matter.
How long ago did we start that war? 2001? Shucks, that was more than 20 years ago.
Longer, actually. And not that it's over. In fact, we just re-upped our subscription.
And now, some young people say war is necessary to support our “lifestyle.”
This 32-year-old Black girl politely agreed to disagree with my observation about the perpetual war in the Middle East because my point of view differs from hers due to our background differences. America was founded on slavery.
I guess Chinese slave labor is also necessary to support our lifestyle.
Slavery and Death. Import and export. Check, check.
As long as it's someone else. Right, LaBron?
And what about the open border?
A: "We were all immigrants once."
And what about cartels?
A: "That’s over-hyped."
And now, Kamala says she’ll start fracking.
What were you just saying about the necessity of war to support our lifestyle?
And Kamala says she’ll build the wall.
What were you just saying about the open border?
To recap, who remembers how much the Left despised George W Bush? And Cheney?
And now those guys endorse Kamala.
The Uni-Party endorses Kamala. Because they're rightfully Uni-fied against Hitler himself.
So, tell me, youngin’, who is Dick Cheney?
What did Trump say when the so-called moderator asked that loaded question about Ukraine?
"I want people to stop dying."
What a pussy. I want my MTV!
Who remembers when liberals were anti-war? Damn "hippies."
No more hippies; now we just have the weed. Albeit laced with fentanyl.
Let's lighten up. Who remembers transvestites? Seven feet tall, cruising the mall.
At least nowadays, they have the decency to grow some tits and chop off their dicks.
And please, lose those ridiculous balls.
Typical man, afraid of commitment.
And speaking of real men, Dick Cheney should take Tim Walz hunting. Those manly men.
Forget MAGA. Vote for War and Slavery!
Now, that sounds like a party, American-style!
Everybody get your popcorn, and don't touch that dial!