Left-hand Navigation

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I proposed to change a left-hand navigation to a top nav, but it was opposed by the client.

I really could use the real estate because I have to drop in a map of Canada and more buttons, but despite my pleas it is not to be.

So, I'm redesigning for a third time, but when I send my mockups I'm including the following unabashed critique of the current design:

yo left-hand nav so old it opened for the Dead Sea Scrolls

yo left-hand nav so old it remembers what's under Canada's ice

yo left-hand nav so old it works better in Mosaic

yo left-hand nav so old customers need a tetanus shot after clicking

yo left-hand nav so old the content area is requesting support from NATO

yo left-hand nav so old and fat the map of Canada corroborates the Bering Strait land bridge theory

yo left-hand nav so fat the Eskimos are eyeing it hungrily

yo left-hand nav so fat the header can't see the footer

yo left-hand nav so fat it thinks best practices means wiping it's mouth

yo left-hand nav so fat noone can sell their homes, unemployment is at 9.5%, and they're still printing money

...and...

yo left-hand nav so fat it probably thinks this song is about it


So, then I showed a friend (CP) the page and his reaction was:

Yo left nav so old, it thinks the only link color available is "#0000FF"

Yo left nav so old, it's stylesheet has bell bottoms

Yo left nav so old, it's anchor tag was used to keep the Mayflower from floating away

Yo left nav so old, the BREAK tag behind it has an osteoporosis warning

Yo left nav so old, it's SPAN is measured in cubits

Yo left nav so old, it's CLASS was 1961

Yo left nav so old, it's container tags are made of wood

...and...

Yo left nav so old, when I told it to rollover, I had to help it back up


...and another friend saw the link and had this to say:

MM

Yo left nav so fat, the earth tilted when I uploaded it.

Yo left nav so fat, the earth is now orbiting it.

Yo left nav so old, it’s only graphics are in ASCII.

Yo left nav so fat, China blocked Google with it.

Yo left nav so old, my grandma thinks it’s cool.

Yo left nav so old, its favorite phrase is “you got mail.”

Yo left nav so old, it predates Times New Roman.

Yo left nav so old, it only operates on punch-cards.

Yo left nav so old, it’s encrusted with microbes from Mars.

Yo left nav so old, it only responds to telegrams.

Yo left nav is so old, Netscape Navigator 2.0 broke it.

Yo left nav so fat, you have to roll over twice to get off it.

Yo left nav so fat, your web browser runs inside it.

Yo left nav so fat, Shakespeare’s Hamlet fits on one line.

Yo left nav so fat, pilots frequently attempt a landing.

Yo left nav so fat, it will change you’re diet....it should.

Yo left nav so fat, Palin built a ‘bridge to nowhere’ over it.

Yo left nav so fat, Runsfield claimed it harbors terrorists.

And...

Yo left nav so fat, Obama declared it a no-fly zone.

Upon further reflection, I thought:

Yo left nav so old Indiana Jones used it to find the Lost Ark

yo left nav so fat it's fogging up the screen

and...

yo left nav so hairy and greasy and full of worms I had to put it under quarantine with a sign that says 'detour' and throw up a top nav


...a sobering observation from OS amphibian, BH:

what can i reasonably say when your blog uses left nav... u so greasy

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